Why Losing At Chess Hurts So Much (And The Antidote)

excellent blog, I think it would have helped me if it had come before. before because I found my serenity, I experienced what you are talking about, my hypothesis was that the "pain" after a chess game was mainly due to the fact that the longer a game is, the more frustration you feel by losing. The answer can be found in psychoanalysis: humans have a natural reflex: humans like to build, a long game of chess is like a sandcastle that you build patiently, the pain of losing a game of chess is a reminiscence of the child who sees his sand castle destroyed by the tide, it is ancestral and it comes from an innate reflex of survival: the caveman who loses his slowly built fire did not survive. a factor that can still be found today is that when you lose a game of chess you feel sad that you lost a good thing, I noticed that the shorter the game, the less painful is, unless if you are caught by surprise in a trap. I managed to forget the ranking, I told myself that the most important thing was quality rather than quantity and that chess is an adrenaline sport. Saying that chess is only a game makes me smile because many live from this game and therefore the intensive practice of chess makes it a sport. besides what Ted says is right, if we feel less frustration in other games or sports, it's because chess requires a strategic, tactical, positional, and psychological understanding which makes the game longer and difficult, therefore more frustrating to lose. a game of tic tac toes is short and brief, a taekwondo is short and brutal, chess is long and brutal

Very nice blog, I also have experienced a pressure when my parents expect a lot out of me, so when I lose I feel the need to win a game.

Good blogs

Hello

Seriously, I lost a terrible game today. Like, I was winning, or I could of drawn, but I somehow managed to lose. Feeling alot better after seeing this article.

that's about it and i'm "affraid" to play rated games. i love my rating points so much that i'm even ready to make second account for rated games and this account also become "the precius", since i went well on that one. i can't help but i really love this game. And yes all what was written is true I curse out loud when press Analyse that "shame" how could it be that i was so stupid or missed that move. I guess also the time factor adds additional stress and then if the game is rated it can happend that i'm playing like monkey!

From a psychological perspective, I believe the suggested antidote is incorrect. The answer is to recognize that you if you gave it your all and lost, you've gained an opportunity to learn. Keeping a diary of explanations for your losses and wins will help you to keep things in perspective. Developing objectively and viewing chess as a learning opportunity will keep your focused and calm during the game and to recover from your losses.

I feel the same way. And I'm not even that good, I thought I was advanced beginner, but I'm still a beginner after a year of playing chess. Losing many games in a row feels like being kicked in the stomach repeatedly, lol!

Also when I win and check my game with so much ego boost I feel unbeatable.